February 04, 2010

Being Home Alone

I am asked quite often if I still like being home and yes, I do. Being home means many days of being at home alone but it doesn’t mean that I am lonely.

For many years I worked outside of the home and dealt with the public and specifically our clients. The moment I would arrive at work the phone would ring and clients would stop by to talk, whether they had an appointment or not. I would spend a couple of hours taking care of people’s needs, before I even was able to type one word on a legal document. This led to my bringing a lot of work home at night in order to keep up.

Work became an interruption to my life. Years of my life were spent burning the candle at both ends. It seemed that my work life was spilling over into my home life constantly and the lines between work and home were being blurred.

Now I have my morning cup of coffee and I decide what I am going to do that day and make my plans. The only interruptions I have are an occasional phone call. I am in control of my day which brings me great satisfaction.

It is different when you are home with small children and have no adult contact during the day. Getting away with some friends is a good idea and in many ways I feel it is a necessity to connect with other mothers at that time in your life. It is like hitting the refresh button on your computer.

I was home for a few years off and on when my boys were younger so I know what it is like to be home with a baby or toddler and have no adult contact during the day. It was harder and even though I liked being home, it wasn’t without its interruptions. When you have kids you can make plans and those plans can change. I had to be flexible with what I wanted to do in a day. A simple day planned with getting the laundry done or perhaps cleaning could take forever sometimes when my boys would want and need to go for a walk, they were sick or fussy, or just the fact that every household chore took a little longer when you are also caring for little ones. My alone time came when my husband got home from work and we ate and I would get out and go for a walk alone.

Being home alone works for me in my life at this time. I have the opportunity to meet friends for lunch when I want to or to help out at my church. These are my choices and are not interruptions. I am in charge of my life and what I do with my day.  I finally have the opportunity to focus all of my attention on my family and our home. 

Nearly every day it is me alone at home and I find that after many years of being surrounded by people in a high paced office, that home has become my sanctuary.

I have a purpose in my life right now and that is a strong desire to be home.

This is where I am meant to be.


Elizabeth said...

I just found your blog and added it to my favorites! Hello...from another Iowa girl!

Martha said...

Welcome, Elizabeth. I'm happy you found my blog.

Joan said...

Your blog is just what the doctor ordered. I recently had to quit work as a Registered Nurse; I have been in nursing since 1979. I have arthritis, and had a total knee replacement a year and a half ago, and then recently suffered a stress fracture in my right foot. My doctor thinks this happened due to arthritis and recommended either getting an easier job where I wouldn't be on my feet so much, or to retire early- I won't be 62 for several months.
It was a hard decision to make, but I knew if I keet working, I would continue to suffer physically. I love being home; for most of my married life I worked full time. There have been only very brief times I wasn't working, and much of the time I felt overwhelmed and stressed. My husband has a job which involves long hours, so he can help very little.
I love getting up in the morning; I miss my patients, and the people I worked with, but it is wonderful to know I have the whole day to do whatever I want.
Financially, it has been hard because I have to watch every penny. We were used to having two incomes, and so accordingly we lived within those means. It is good to find sites like yours for inspiration.

Martha said...

Welcome to my blog, Joan. It sounds as if you have been through quite a lot of physical pain lately. Even though it can be challenging to live on one income, the upside is that you do get to plan your day and rest when you need to.

I think that the one challenge to living on one income is getting used to it. By that I mean you can't just get in the car and go purchase whatever you want. You have to plan your purchases.

For me, at the end of the day the benefit is not having to live with work stress and being more rested and happy.