Helping Others

It reached 84 degrees here today and I have to say that I am loving this weather.  We haven't had any rain in two weeks and the ground is hard and dry, but after all the rain and flooding this summer, I am not concerned in the least.  This is great painting weather.  Yes, the painting of the fence continues.  But, the fence is a total of 200 feet in circumference and since I am painting both sides I have 400 feet of fence to paint. 
Today I was painting the outside of the fence next to the sidewalk.  Several people walked by during the day and would tell me I was doing a great job.  I would stand back and look at the fence and say, "Yeah, I am doing a great job."  Not that it matters to anyone except me. 

There is a retired couple in our neighborhood that walk by in the late afternoon.  They have been watching me scrape the fence and were thrilled that I had finally reached the painting phase.  I took a break and we visited for about 10 minutes about my dog, the fence and we even talked about marriage.  Then as they walked away they told me "you're doing a great job."  Their compliment meant the most to me because both of them look like they have done some painting in their lives so they are good critics and judges. 

When I am outside working on a project I end up seeing a lot of people.  It is kind of uplifting to have a conversation with someone that lives a block away from you and you really don't know them except for seeing them walk by your house daily.  

This morning I picked up some groceries and as I left the parking lot I noticed an elderly lady with a cane walking down the sidewalk and carrying a bag and her purse.  I pulled up next to her and said "Mam, I know you don't know me and I don't know you, but may I give you a ride home?"  She looked at me and looked at her bag and said "yes."  She got in my car and I drove her to her house that was about 4 blocks from the grocery store.  I opened the door for her and helped her out and to the door of her house and said goodbye.  She thanked me.  As I drove away I realized that I should have given her my name and phone number in case she ever needed a ride again.  I am sure that I will see her again as this is a small town. 

When I was a little girl my mom would take two elderly ladies from our church to the grocery store.  We called them Grandma Bentley and Grandma Schuler.  Seemed like any old lady was called Grandma to us.  I would go with Grandma Bentley throughout the store and my older sister or my mom would go with Grandma Schuler.  When these ladies became more home bound we would stop by their apartments and they would give us their grocery list and the money and we would buy their groceries for them. 

So today, this little old lady kind of reminded me of Grandma Bentley and that little voice in my head told me to stop and help her.  She tugged at my heart strings. 

I know that in this day and age it took a little bit of trust from this elderly lady for her to get in my vehicle and let me help her home.  I must have an honest face or in the alternative, she looked pretty tired.  In the end, it is all about taking care of each other and taking care of our elderly neighbors and friends.  Perhaps I will have the opportunity to help this lady again and I will be able to exchange my phone number with her.  I am praying that this will happen.

It seems that with the busyness of our lives, we need to stop and be a friend to the elderly.  What is their day like?  Do they live alone and have to walk to the grocery store and back every few days?  Are they lonely?  Something to ponder. 

Treasure Friendships

Monday night I went to bed with a stomach ache and yesterday I woke up with a stomach ache.  I was light headed and had a headache.  So I did what any woman would do, that doesn't have young children that is, I sat in the comfy chair in the living room and fell back asleep, woke up at 10:00 a.m. and decided I had to get up. 

My husband told me that I have been over doing with all of the outside work and that I am probably worn out.  My house is in disorder. I need to clean but would rather spend my days outside getting the work done.  Winter is just around the corner and the weather is phenomenal right now.  It is in the 70's and sunshiney and that is the forecast for the next 7 days.  After that, who knows, so I have been pushing myself.  Also I have been isolating myself at home in order to get the work done.  I can go days without seeing or talking to a friend because I have been so focused on the projects that I must get done before winter. 

So I proceeded with caution and did a couple loads of laundry and started to pick up the clutter.  Then, the doorbell rang.  It was a friend I hadn't seen in a while.  Now imagine your house in disarray, dusty, somewhat dirty, laundry baskets with unfolded clothes in them and a pile of dirty dishes in the sink and around on the kitchen counter.  Clutter is everywhere.  I opened the door and let her in.  I knew she wouldn't judge and would understand my situation.  So we sat at the diningroom table, drank a cup of coffee and caught up on what was going on in our lives.  This friend is a farmer's wife and she understands the need to get projects done, especially this time of year.  So, we have made a commitment to get together after I am done with my painting projects and my hope is that we can go away for a day trip somewhere.  In the meantime, we will have the opportunity for quick cups of coffee. 

This friend was the medicine that I needed.  I have been tied down to this house for a long time and I haven't been getting out enough.  The weight of everything that has to get done before winter has been weighing heavy on me.  In the meantime I will work on the projects and take some time out for me. 

I think God sent this friend my way so that I could spend the time connecting with another woman and take my mind off of all the things I need to get done.  Lesson learned.  Friendships are important to the mental health of women in general and to the stay at home wife/mom, those friendships are even more important.  I need to cherish those friendships and even when I am busy, take the time to connect with a friend.  I cannot isolate myself when I have a lot to get done.  Instead I need to take coffee breaks with a friend every now and then just like I did when I was in the workforce.  All work and no play does not make for a fun day or life.  

Lunch with my BFF

One week ago my BFF called me to see if I would like to go shopping with her in Des Moines and have lunch out.  We do this about once a year.  It is our day away shopping in the "big" city.  This week our family hit a budget crunch and I knew that we could not afford to have me go shopping and go out to eat.  My DH disagreed and he handed me some cash for lunch and told me to go.  In his words "sometimes you just need to get away."  I felt guilty, but I went.

We stopped at Kohl's and began to look at the sales racks.  My BFF picked out several items to try on and I found out that there are some really ugly clothes out there.  Who wears this stuff?  Perhaps that is why the clearance racks were full. 

My BFF earns a 6 figure salary whereas our total family income is far below that.  Money has never been an issue in our friendship.  She has always been able to buy anything she wants so she was not limited to the clearance racks. 

I followed her around the store helping her look for certain items. While she tried on clothes, I searched the racks.  Guess what?  I was having fun and I wasn't the one spending big bucks on clothes. 

After she had tried on a bunch of clothes and shoes we headed to the bath section as I have been on the search for a new shower curtain for over a year.  By this time we were kind of silly and she suggested that I purchase the Curious George shower curtain.  The sad thing about it is that I think my DS would like that in his bathroom.  We were laughing and having a good time.

From Kohl's off we went to Bed, Bath and Beyond.  I was looking at the drapes and all of them had tassels and ribbons hanging from them.  My BFF commented that "it looks like a giant cat toy."  Now we are getting to the point that the shopping is over and we are making fun of designers, so it was time for lunch at the Macaroni Grill.  We were laughing all the way out of Bed, Bath and Beyond and we were still giggling when we walked into the Macaroni Grill. 

That is what it is like when we get together.  We get silly and we have fun being girlfriends. 

We had left at 9:00 a.m. and were home by 3:00 p.m.  My DH was right.  Lunch out with my BFF and helping her shop for clothes was just what I needed - girl time.  Oh and as to lunch - it was $15.00 with tip.  It felt so good to sit down in a decent restaurant, be served, listen to beautiful Italian music and enjoy some time with my BFF.

As a side note, I grew up in Jamestown, New York.  Jamestown is Lucille Ball's birthplace.  My BFF is my Ethel and this clip from I Love Lucy sums up our friendship.