Higher Prices, Lower Wages

There was an article in the Des Moines Register today that confirmed what everyone already knows, prices have gone up.  The premise of the article was that many people have not recovered from the Great Recession because prices have gone up and wages have gone down.  Okay, I already knew that, but the article gave statistical information which I found quite interesting.

In Iowa the median household income in 2007 was $52,371 and in 2012 was $50,957.  In the U.S. as a whole the median household income in 2007 was $56,189 and in 2012 was $51,371.  Americans are paying about 12.5% more for household goods.  In 2007 a pound of ground beef cost $2.40 and in August of this year a pound cost $3.46.  A loaf of whole wheat bread in 2007 cost $1.71 while in August of this year a loaf cost $2.04.  A pound of coffee was $3.50 in 2007 and in August of this year a pound was $5.21.  Gasoline has consistently fluctuated over the past few years and has increased to the point that it was not uncommon in Iowa to pay an average of $3.37 by the end of August this year.  Fortunately as of today, the price of a gallon of gas in our area is $2.97. 

Many Americans continue to feel the pinch as they are still cutting back, have tried to adjust to lower wages, higher costs, have lost their homes, jobs, are having problems paying their mortgage and have increased credit card debt in order to pay basic bills. 

The recent fiasco in Congress created more financial problems for many people which has led me to believe this:  we are on our own people.  I have stated this recently on this blog.  While thankfully there are programs that can be helpful for families, many people don’t want to have to need these programs.   It is comforting that they are there to help but when the government shut down occurred some of these resource programs were suspended such as the W.I.C. program (Women, Infants and Children).

I believe it is becoming the responsibility of each of us to take care of each other.  If you have a little extra and you have a neighbor in need, it is up to us to take care of our neighbors.  Sometimes we may not have a lot, but a loaf of bread or a half a gallon of milk can go a long way for someone who does not have much.

Recently I had an individual comment and ask what I am doing to combat higher prices.  I cut out some frills in our budget such as getting my nails done and working out at Curves to help our budget, but there is more that I can do.  I have become a little lax, but with retirement only 13 years away and the desire to continue to be a stay at home wife and grandmother, there is more I need to do. 

You know what it is like, you sacrifice for such a long time, you need a vacation from the sacrificing.  You get tired of counting pennies and you just want to go out to a restaurant and spend some money on a great meal.  I have been there.  Funny thing is this:  I can buy a 16 oz. steak on sale for $6.99 (recently $4.99), cut it in two, grill it, add a potato, small salad and a homemade dessert for a lot less than I will spend for the two of us at a great restaurant and it tastes better.  The same is true if I marinate some inexpensive chicken breasts and grill them with some vegetables.  The point is that sometimes you need to take a break from the scrimping but you don’t need to throw the budget out the window.  Sometimes it is creating a special meal and serve it by candle light OR as we did when our kids were little, having pizza on a blanket on the living room floor in the winter  - our version of a winter picnic.

When it comes to scrimping and getting the most out of your hard earned money, there is one thing that will save you a lot:  being aware of what you are doing daily.  I know it sounds weird, but think about it.  Are you aware when you run the water for a shower or bath how much water you are using?  When you squirt dish soap into the dish pan to wash dishes, are you using too much soap, the same being true for dishwasher detergent? When you cook a casserole could you get by with using less meat and more vegetables or pasta and rice?   Instead of purchasing ice cream bars and cones as a treat, buy a half gallon of ice cream on sale and put it in your own cones.  Sprinkle a few inexpensive sprinkles on top and you have a cheap treat for your kids.  Treats are great to keep us going during hard times.

One thing I know is a fact, you can still get great results in cleaning products by using less.  You can save even more money by making your own products or by using plain water to clean extremely dirty windows and then spritzing on the cleaner to finish them off.   The same is for dirty services of any kind.  Get the dirt or grime off as much as possible with warm or hot water and then spritz on the cleaner at the end to finish the cleaning process.

Be aware of what you are doing throughout the day and you will find ways to save money.  

As far as combating food prices, my main tool is my freezer and a storage space for pantry items.  Buying meat and frozen vegetables when they are on sale is a great tool.  If you only have the freezer above your fridge to use, then use it for expensive food items that go on sale such as meat. 

I am a believer in Ivory bar soap.  I can get it on sale with coupons all the time for about 15 cents a bar.  I am steering myself away from the shower gels which are costly.  I don’t need the fragrance as I spritz on a very light amount of perfume after I dress.  No need for the scents of a shampoo with a shower gel and then a lotion along with perfume.  Don’t buy into all of the hype and instead find a bar soap that is cheaper that you like. 

When I am at the store if I need a product and don’t have a coupon, I always give the store brand a try.  This is true for many items.  I am not brand loyal and I am always looking for a cheaper alternative.  For basic items such as canned tomatoes, pork n beans, and such I can virtually not see or taste a difference especially when these items are going into soup, chili and casseroles.  I have always added my own ingredients to pork n beans (ketchup, mustard, brown sugar and vinegar).  Why would I care if they are name brand, store brand or generic?  The same is true of laundry detergent.  If I get a name brand on sale at a really great deal, I buy it (during the summer I can get a great deal on Tide).  I reserve a bottle of  Tide, Wisk, Oxydol or other name brand for those wicked stains that won’t come out.  Then I mix the rest half and half with a store brand that I get on sale.  Once a year a store here in town has their store brand detergent on sale for $1.00 or less for a 29 load size.  I have also done the same with mixing sale bought name brand powdered detergent with the Fels Naptha powdered laundry soap recipe.

I use ivory bar soap (rub it into the stain and let it sit) or a small amount of liquid Dawn dish detergent for pretreating stains.   And since we are on the discussion of laundry, does each family need a ton of clothes in their closets? 

If you have children in the home and you are working, you will have a much more difficult time in saving money because you are busy and you may not have the time to do some money saving tasks.  I am going to address this in another post this week as I have been there and I am also there a little bit now with watching my grandson 4 days a week.  What questions do you have about saving money in general or in a specific area?  What help or ideas do you have or need?  Where are you at in your household budget?  Are you discouraged and struggling?  We may be facing a different America than was there 20 or 40 years ago, but if you are willing to put forth effort and keep a smile on your face, you can make it.  It is sometimes about attitude and the willingness to not give up. 

Leave a comment and I will address them.  

In Search of Contentment - Final Post

4. Quit tying contentment to stuff.

Having more stuff does not bring contentment. This is something that a lot of people need to learn. Many people seem to think that once they have a certain something that they will then suddenly be content. They constantly chase after the one thing that they can buy that will bring them happiness. Perhaps it is the new I-phone that just went on the market or it could be as simple as having the latest movie on dvd. These bring temporary contentment and then you are out to find the next thing that will make you happy.

Don’t misunderstand me, I am not against having things. I am just saying that we make too many emotion tied purchases. The phrase “You can’t buy happiness” is very true.

Right now having more stuff would mean that I would have to work full time. I don’t want to do that at all as I like the freedom that I have by being home and being my own boss. It took me awhile but I now embrace the belief that contentment does come from within yourself.

5. Quit looking at what others have or own. They may not own it after all.

Yes, you may feel a little envious when you see a new car that a friend has just purchased and you would love to have the same car, but is the car payment worth it? Do you really think that when you drive a new car down the street that everyone walking down the street stops to say “what a cool car, that lady sure is successful and smart and pretty and makes wise choices and makes a lot of money and so on.” I pass many new cars every day and I never think these things. Usually I am thinking “please pull over and let me get by.” I am an impatient driver.

Think about this the next time you want what someone else has. What difference would it make in my life to go out and purchase what that person has? Would it suddenly bring me happiness and contentment or would it make me miserable because of what it cost me? Do I really need it? Would I be happier with more money in the bank and not having the stress of another debt payment?

Back when I worked at the law firm, we handled a lot of different cases. It was the divorce cases that were interesting because each party had to file a Financial Affidavit listing all of their assets and liabilities. It was very eye opening to see the debt listed. It was not unusual to see multiple credit cards maxed out in the thousands of dollars. Next up was the mortgage and the car payments. I often wondered if the thousands of dollars of items that were purchased on credit was a great trade off to the marriage. Does anyone ever say “I am so happy that we have all of this credit card debt and I am happy because of it?” I don’t think so.

Finally, to wrap all of this up, the bottom line is this: Contentment comes from relationships. It is the people in our lives that bring contentment, would that we cherished them as much as we should.

Sit down now and make a choice to invest in relationships. I firmly believe that if you are happy with your relationships – spouse, children, other family, and friends that you will be happier and more content beyond anything money can buy.

In Search of Contentment - Part 3

3.  Quit tying contentment to what people think of you. 

"If I am popular, I will be happy and content."

"If people like me and I have a lot of friends, then I will be happy and content." 

"If people want what I have, then I will be happy and content."

 

In this series, I have listed and will list several beliefs that I have observed on searching for contentment.  Some are more on a smaller scale than others.   Today I am focusing on quit tying contentment to what people think of you.  I believe that this is one of the biggest struggles that people can face.  We want to be revered, looked up to, and perceived as successful.  However, being driven by what people think of you can be detrimental to your life and your finances.  If you put your faith in what people think of you, you may never be happy doing what you are now doing.  You will not be content.  

Think about it.  Does what people think of you hold you back or push you forward?  I know that this is a problem that a lot of people have, as there are a lot of designer clothes, new cars and brand new homes being sold even in this economy.  Statements are being made.  Perception is valued above reality.  If I am perceived as being successful, then this will be my new reality.  I will be successful and happy.

The problem with this way of thinking is that if you are going the way of what others think, then you will end up making bad decisions.  It does make you feel as if you have a higher value than others, but it is false and doesn’t last.

Since this blog is about living a frugal life, here is an example of how that kind of thinking can be detrimental.  If I buy this great new expensive car, that I can’t “afford” unless I extend the loan to 72 months, then people will think I am successful.  The same goes with if I build a beautiful large new house, one that I can’t afford, then people will think that I am successful and happy.

Having a nice vehicle or new home is not a bad thing, but if you can’t afford it and if you are only doing it because you want to give a certain impression to people, then it won’t be long before the thrill wears off – especially if you are extended financially and really can’t afford it.  You will not be content in the end.   In fact you will be miserable as there will always be something else you will want in order to give the correct appearance. 

I’ve often wondered how many people are afraid to move forward with their lives because they worry what people will think.  Would more people be able to retire early or more comfortably if they weren’t worried what other people thought?   In other words if you drove an old car and lived in a small two bedroom house, even though you could afford a “McMansion,” would you be able to meet your dream of retiring early or living on one income?  Better yet, would you finally be able to work part time and spend more time with your family?   Contentment can only come when you are doing what truly makes you happy and it does not come from what other people think of you. 

Live your life without worrying about what others think.  It is hard to do at times, but the older I get I realize that doing what you want to do, going your own way does bring true contentment and happiness. 

People thought I was crazy to stay home full time after a successful career as a legal assistant.  I had offers from two attorneys from two nearby cities when we closed the law practice and I know that I would have made a nice sum of money but it just wasn’t what I wanted to do.  This was totally against what people thought I should do.  Some people could not believe that I would “waste my talents” by staying home full time.

I’m not perfect and I still struggle sometimes with the “what will people think” equation, but I am happy.  Here I am 3 years after losing my job working Saturday afternoons at the Public Library and watching an 8 year old neighbor boy after school 4 afternoons a week.  I am doing what I want to do and not because I have to.  I am for the most part, content. 

In Search of Contentment - Part 2

2.  Quit tying contentment to money.

This post is the hardest regarding contentment as let’s put this up front right away, money can make our lives easier and thus we are more content.  For some people they are living in poverty through no fault of their own.  It’s one thing to want more money because your basic needs aren’t being met.  But, it seems to me that most of us are constantly chasing after money for the wrong reasons.  We are setting aside contentment for the day we earn “x” amount of dollars as income for our families or we are waiting to be happy until we are debt free.

It’s not about earning more money, it’s about the money you have and what you do with it.  Perhaps it’s not your income, it’s your debt.  Perhaps it’s not your income but your unrealistic expectations of what you believe you need to have in order to be happy and content.

I speak from experience here.  Years and years ago money was so tight that we could hardly pay our bills.  It was worse than paycheck to paycheck.  The bills weren’t just for utilities and food, the bills were also credit card payments of stuff that we really didn’t need or poor planning on our part for not setting aside money for car repairs and such.  We were young and stupid. 

I would have given anything not to have those debt payments each month as the money spent on credit card payments would have given us plenty of extra money in our budget.  So, in that essence if we wouldn’t have made those poor decisions and been content with what we had as income, we wouldn’t have gone out and bought stuff on credit.  However, I want to go one step further and say that I was miserable because of our debt and I remained miserable.  Yes, we were in debt, but if I only would have stepped back from the situation, recognized what we had done, sat down and made a debt reduction plan, I would have felt better about the situation.  Even in the middle of more expenses than income, I could have found contentment from the peace of mind of having a debt reduction plan and working the plan. 

For many people getting out of debt can take years.  If you wait until everything is paid off and perfect you will have wasted several years of your life being stuck in the mindset of being discontent.   Draw strength from your debt reduction plan and be content in the knowledge that you are taking action.

I know people that seem to be holding their breath until they make a certain amount of income.  They are unhappy until they make “x” amount of money and then they will allow themselves to be content.

Don’t fall into this mindset.  I know we have come through some really hard times over the past few years and many of my followers have experienced unemployment.  But never fall into the mindset that you will only be happy when you earn a set amount of money.  Learn to live on the income you earn now and make changes so you can continue to live on what you earn.   

In 2007 I started to wear down from working the long hours that I had been working.  We had a lot of debt coming from paying college tuition for our oldest son and from his wedding in the summer of 2007.  We buckled down to get the debt paid off.  I applied myself to my job and did the very best that I could and we concentrated on paying off our debt.  In the fall of 2008, actually 4 years ago right now, I started to totally burn out and I began thinking about quitting my job and staying home full time.  My happiness was not tied to earning more money, but gaining more time and peace in my life. 

Some of the happiest and contented people I know are those who are living within their incomes.  They are thankful for what they have and do not think that the way they are living is beneath their means or undignified. 

I am still learning this concept of not tying money to contentedness.  Old habits, or should I say thoughts, are hard to shake.  However as time passes, I find that I find contentment and money not as closely related as I used to.  

Next Post:  3.  Quit tying contentment to what people think of you.

In Search of Contentment - Part 1

In this series, I am reflecting on the subject of finding contentment.  What does contentment do with “The Path to Frugality?”  Plenty.  One example is that if you aren’t content, you are more apt to spend money in order to bring yourself a feeling of contentment or happiness. 

I struggle with being content and I know that if I could just feel contentment with my life, I would be at peace with many things in my life and be happier.   It is interesting that the majority of people are not content and struggle or search for contentment.  Why is this?  Is it because we are constantly shown in the media that we need to have “this or that” to be happy?

Over the next several days I want to focus on contentment.  I am working my way through a period in my life when I realize my life would be happier and easier if I would learn to be content.  Yes I believe that contentment is learned and in order to feel contentment we need to make a conscious effort to change our thoughts and quit sabotaging how we feel about ourselves and our lives. 

So, tonight I want to bring up the number 1 obstacle I have with finding contentment.

1.  Quit tying contentment to future events.

I will be content when the kids go to elementary school, when the kids graduate from school, when we make more money, when we have a newer house, when Christmas is over, when we are debt free, when we get a new car, when we pay the car off, when we remodel the kitchen, when I lose 10 lbs., when, when, when. . .  The list can go on and on until you are in your retirement years and look back and see a lot of years of waiting for time to pass.  Ugh.

Why do I do this?  Why do I always have a carrot of “mirages of contentment” dangling in front of me all the time?  I have always had “goals” of things that I want to accomplish but I have grown accustomed to delaying happiness or contentment until that goal is met or an event happens.  I know that I am not alone in this. 

I remember specifically when we purchased the home that we are living in now and how I could hardly wait for May 27, 1997 when we would close on the house and we would be homeowners.  I would finally have my house and no one could dictate to me whether I have a dog or cat, or what color I could paint the walls or anything else that a landlord might dictate.  I felt content for awhile but then the reality of owning an old house sets in along with the expenses and the expectations for remodeling an old house.  

It never used to be this way.  I can vividly remember 26 years ago when our oldest son was 1 and I was able to quit my job and be home with him.  In order to do this I babysat 1 other child for money for our food budget.  I remember how simple our lives were back then and how happy I was.  We faced many financial challenges during those years, but I never lost sight of one thing and that I was living my dream of being a stay at home mom, at least for a few years.  

Three years ago I again achieved a dream of being a stay at home wife.  It was and continues to be fulfilling but along the way I have lost much of the contentment I felt that first morning I woke up to my new stay at home life.  What has happened?  How did my thinking change about contentment?   

There is not one “aha” moment that I can trace back to, but somewhere I made an unconscious decision that in order to be content, my life needed to be perfect.  Everyone has their own idea of what perfectionism means to them.  My idea of perfection is different from everyone else’s but somewhere in the past 15 years I have become a believer in I can only be happy and content when “______” (fill in the blank).

It was this summer that I realized that I was very unhappy with myself and my life.  I couldn’t immediately come up with a reason for feeling unhappy.  I spent a couple of days spending some time relaxing and taking a break from my normal responsibilities to reflect.  While I was sitting on my back porch I was reviewing my calendar and penciled off some dates of activities and family events.   And then it happened.  I started thinking “I will be so happy when March comes.”  We have a special event to plan and I am looking forward to it.  Then I looked to October and saw that I had an activity at church to plan and although I liked the activity, I hated the planning part.  Boy I will be glad when that is over.  But I went one step further.  If I can just get through to the end of October, I will be so much happier. 

This is what I said to myself and it was that statement that made me realize that I had a problem:  wrong thinking.  I had been living my life not enjoying every day of it, but putting my enjoyment or contentment on hold until something specific happened in the future.  I was plodding along looking forward to an event that would be fun or looking forward to something being over.  

I made a vow at that point that I had to change the way I thought about my life.  I had to stop what I was thinking and make changes so I could enjoy every day of my life. Change does not come easy for me and I knew this was going to be hard.  Like a bad habit, wrong thinking that has gone on for years will take time to change.   Changing perspective and modifying the way I think would be the only way that I could start (yes, it is a beginning) to bring contentment into my life.  It takes 21 days to change a bad habit.  I figured that I am a slow learner so it would take at least 30 days for me, but if it brought happiness, peace and contentment I was more than willing to put in the effort.

Every time I start to think “I’ll be content when”, I say to myself – “that is a lie.  You can be content now.  It is your choice.”  I know it sounds silly, almost like something from the old Oprah Shows, but if I am alone I actually say this out loud.  I say it a couple of times if I need to. 

It is taking more than 30 days but it is working.  Every time I say that phrase, I am acknowledging that contentment is available to me now if I want it and I don’t have to wait.  I can be content with my life if I really want to be contented.  The choice is mine.

If you struggle with this, you have to make a conscious choice to change the way you think.  Delaying contentment or putting it off until something happens means that it will never happen.  You will never, never be satisfied with your life and it will only make you sad and disappointed.  It is no way to live your life. 

Repeat after me “I can be content now.  It is my choice.”  Repeat.  “I can be content now.  It is my choice.” 

If I can take steps to change, you can take steps to change. 

Next post:  2.  Quit tying contentment to money.

Upcoming Series - In Search of Contentment

Contentment

The above picture of our puppy Molly, taken when she was just a few weeks old, symbolizes contentment to me. She is sleeping after having a nice meal and having been played with. Now she has settled on our back porch for a nap and she looks very contented and happy. 

What makes you happy? Are you constantly riding the highs of happiness to be brought down by disappointment? How does happiness affect your finances? 

I am working on a series of posts in which I will share with you my struggle to find contentment. Yes, I struggle with this but I am sure I am not alone. You know, the" if only I could have this in my life" or "if only this would happen and I would be content" type of attitude.

I am one of those type of people who struggle with not being able to live in the moment, but to hold off living or being truly happy until certain good things happen. 

It is my goal that you will be able to learn from my experience and how I am turning myself around to a different way of thinking about being content with life. I hope you will enjoy the upcoming posts and I look forward to your comments.